Friday, May 27, 2022

The Wedding! Georgia and Jesse tie the knot! Part II

 


It has been a month now since Georgia and Jesse officially linked their stars together. 
At Foxcroft we have done some entertaining, gotten back to work, and mostly erased the signs of the wedding. I suppose we still have a stall with kegs that need to be returned, there are 8 leftover bottles of artisanal barbecue sauce in my laundry room and I've got some collapsable tables to wrangle back into a closet.
 I've had some time to think now about how each wedding is different, and special, 
but the wedding does not a marriage make. 
Although an equation, or a recipe for success would be convenient, there seems to be no exacting math for the proof to ensure marital success, but instead a constant blending of moments that equate to love and devotion as a daily decision and action. I think marriage success distilled to a math equation would look like one of the monster chalk boards on the set of A Beautiful Mind, overwhelming and impossible to comprehend. 


And still, the math would not work for every marriage. 
 During his wedding reception speech, Huz used some marriage-math wisdom of how it has worked for him to choose to give 100% to his partner, and expect only 50% in return- my implied deficits leading to laughter, my "oh boy, he's really stepping into it now" face ( photographer caught this one perfectly-I'll post below) and good natured ribbing from the crowd. 
Which, with debatably inaccurate math did delightfully deploy the integer of humor to the equation of marital success. 
I have been ever so fortunate in my choice of partner. We laugh a lot. 

Weddings are at their heart, a ceremony of a promise between two people. All the other stuff, the outfits and flowers and food and dancing, isn't integral to the promise of commitment, but a recognition of its significance to their family and friends. The celebration of the choice by Georgia and Jesse- to join forces for life- makes it appreciable for all who are present. I think the wedding day choices become a sort of proxy of importance to the bride and groom. Sharing the things with which they have particular ties make the wedding day itself an amalgamation of the relationship. It becomes valuable to serve their favorite drink, or dance to "their song", include a beloved pet, or a truculent one -as with Henri, the gander/star of the Hamilton family wedding game I shall detail below- as I mentioned these make weddings personal and unique. 

There may not be math for marriage, but weddings have a more comprehensible formula: 
(devotion)(ceremony + family and friends + church/state )+ party =  wedding day wonder

Seriously joyful celebration commence! 

After the ceremony, the newlyweds retired to the front porch for a few minutes alone, and then joined the bridal party to dig up a bottle of bourbon. This is a tradition I had never heard of, but the gist is you bury a bottle of bourbon at the ceremony site some months, or a year prior to the wedding, to ensure fine weather. It worked.
Then, you all have a little celebratory toast!


Wedding dress and a shovel-that's my girl!



Bourbon thus liberated, to the porch for some "refreshment!"



Cheers! 
I believe in this photo, you can tell from the smile; the bourbon drinkers, and the good sports. 

Differing levels of trepidation. A few have "are we really doing this?" expressions. 


This one makes me laugh every time.
"Shots for the bride!" 









The wedding party photo on Foxcroft's front porch. Timeless! 


Then, the bourbon took ahold. 


Another classic southern wedding photo; bride, groom, flowers, magnolia tree! 


The complicated affaire of "bustling the wedding gown". 


The bar was open and the tent was ready for guests! 


Just add the new Mr. And Mrs. Donmoyer! 




And let the eating and drinking begin! The couple had chosen local treasure, The Barbeque Exchange, run by acclaimed CIA trained chef/owner Craig Hartman to cater the party. Everyone filled up on Virginia barbeque in all its glory! 

While we ate, the excellent band Uncle Henry's Favorites played bluegrass and folk tunes. The band has been together since 1985, and you can see and hear them on Youtube if you want some wedding flavor while reading the blog! 

As the meal was winding down, Huz took the mic to welcome everyone to Foxcroft, and gave a lovely speech that delivered right in the feels!

The well intended mathcentric marriage advice that went awry caused this face captured here. 

Time for cake. 
The couple had a beautiful dessert bar with classic and lavender shortbread, cupcakes with raspberry filling ones of carrot cake, but The Cake was this delicious and gluten free beauty made by one of the bride's besties, also a bridesmaid. She is renowned for her cakes, and consented to make one for the reception. It was so good!!

Soon, thereafter, the bride and groom took to the dance floor- to the tune of "Poor Boy's Delight". I don't think it is "their song", but the tune is lovely, and the lyrics are about dancing in Virginia on a Saturday night in June. Change the lyric from "Molly" to "Georgia" and "June" to "April" and it's perfect.





Georgia's Daddy cuts in. Love. 
 




The groom and his lovely momma. 


The newlyweds and their parents take the floor; or the barnyard if you will!

My own. 

My delightful in-laws, one of the 4 sets of grandparents with 60+ years of marriage. 

Eldest with her wedding date. 

Center of photo, my parents cutting a rug for more than 60 years. 

Youngest and his wedding date. 

In autumn 2005, we held a barn dance in honor of Huz turning 40. It was in the big, beautiful bank barn at Cowfeathers Farm, our inimitable home in Ohio. We opened the huge doors to the barn, filled it with food, friends and a 6 piece square dance band with a caller, Pete Shew and the Back Porch Swing Band. For that and the 10 years following, we enjoyed this tradition every year at Cowfeathers, rain, shine, wind, and less wind. Young and old would square dance, laugh, eat and turn back time. City folk mingled with our farmer friends and learned how to properly "swing yo' pardner" and "allemande left". I had hoped to leave all that attended with wonderful memories of family, friendship and foolishness. It was always the favorite night of the year for me to feed the animals all stalled and bedded beneath the dance floor with the band music, laughter and conversation drifting through the floor boards and the party lights making shadows in the pastures. 
So, I was gratified to learn that Georgia wanted to repeat that beloved tradition and have a square dance band for the wedding celebration. Jesse, who had never had the pleasure of square dancing , generously agreed, and great fun began. "Fun" is from the late Middle English word "fon" meaning "to be a fool." Apt, because part of the fun of square dancing with mostly novices is that everyone is in on the joke, we are all fools having fun! 

To get the dance party started? The Virginia Reel, of course! 














Sometimes things go wrong! The bride knows. 
Also, how adorable is the little bar truck!!?
They had local ciders and beers on tap, as well as Dark-n-Stormy cocktails and water, fresh strawberry basil lemonade and iced tea, vital for dancers on a warm day!








Not all wedding gowns allow for a proper behind the back swing! 


Maybe we are all a bit directionally challenged.


Another personal favorite photo of the day. 





The shadows are growing long, so we took a dance break to play the "Gander Goose Poop Game". This is a game unique to my family, I should think. It was first devised 28 years ago at the wedding of my eldest sister. She and her husband were wed at our family farm in Connecticut. We have had geese since the 1970s, each one of the ganders a dinosaur (Velociraptor x T Rex). I tried to explain our goose affiliation in a Cowfeathers Farm blog post years ago, called "Every girl's dream; a Velociraptor of my own." It remains somewhat inexplicable. My sister's wedding had a big hand built wooden dance floor that we painted in a large blue and white checkerboard pattern. During the reception, a few of the bridesmaids sold the squares off for a modest sum, and the purchaser could pen a message and their name in the square. When they were sold off, we had a 50/50 (50% to the winner, 50% to the newlyweds), winner determined by the square on which the gander pooped. The attendees surrounded the dance floor, and my mother placed the gander in the center. The gift of using a goose is they poop about every 12 seconds. (Okay, they average every 12 minutes, but it goes faster, I swear.) Also, they can't decide on whom to attack when there are so many juicy choices. So they tend to walk around hooting, and then poop! 
Georgia was a youngster when she started begging for geese- obviously inherited my penchant for anserine punishment. Henri and Henrietta arrived as adorable, fuzzy yellow babies some dozen years ago. That leads many to the second question, as they draw away from the squawking, threatening creature (the first being "will he attack me?"; answer "yes.") which is "how long will it live?" About 20 years is expected, but George, a gander born in 1927 made it nearly to 50. Henrietta succumbed to a raccoon, but  sorry, Jesse, you may yet inherit Henri. Georgia's fondness continues, "cuddles" him every time she visits. So, it made sense to revive the Gander Goose Poop Game for her nuptials.  We made a few modifications. Without a painted dance floor, we chalked a basic grid on the horse trailer parking pad, and let guests put their name in squares. We skipped the 50/50 portion, as in 2022 no one has cash at hand. And, instead of the mother (me) collecting the gander, it was the father, Huz, who is incidentally, Henri's best friend and one of the only humans he has ever taken to. He occasionally tolerates Youngest, and instantly took to Jesse. He actually lets Jesse pet him, and removes no flesh in token. Every other human should be on notice. 
Since Henri is attached to Huz, when Huz placed him in the center of the grid, Huz had to parade around the outside of the grid, because Henri just wanted to walk to him. 


Choosing the favorite square.

The star of the show. 





And the "winner" of  poop in the square and bragging rights? 
Laura S.! She is both a farmer and a preschool teacher, so, destiny?



Post Poop Game shenanigans with the Hamilton cousins. Making trouble, and this "kissy face" pose together for 50 years. 

The cousins after a rusty rendition of "We Are The Cheerleadahs" a song and dance satire created 45+ years ago by 10 year olds, and somehow still in our repertoire today. 

The elusive photo of the photographer with her subjects! 



Time for some "golden hour" photos. 

Akin to the three generation photo in Part I of the ladies, here are our gents! 


Eldest and her date. 





Jesse and his mom. 


Georgia with her horse, Nellie, and goose, Henri. 



Also, talk about good sport, Nellie is brave. She and Henri have gone rounds! Photographer, KZ, also has extensive Henri experience, and I am proud of her for holding her ground long enough to take this photo. 


Just for laughs, the shot of getting Henri into the shot! 

A recognized method for goose handling, the "place and dash". 


And, with golden hour fading, the newlyweds made their moves to depart the celebration. 
The first day of marriage is magnificently fêted, but is only counted as 1. As is every day thereafter. 



Choose devotion, choose respect, choose to be kind, choose to laugh 
and choose to love, très fort. 














1 comment:

  1. What absolute JOY Cate and I could read your writing for days on end. Fabulous job capturing the essence of day 1. Wishing them a happily ever after. Favorite photo is the bride with her Nellie and Henri. Cheers!

    ReplyDelete